JoliePitt

I’m not super inclined to believe Brad Pitt is seething with jealousy over Angelina Jolie getting in touch with Jared Leto after they supposedly slithered all over each other back in 2004 when they appeared in Alexander together. As much as I want to forever brand them as home wrecking slores, they actually really seem to be totally into each other. Angelina is most likely just striking while the iron is hot since Jared is a Hot Hobo Jesus commodity after winning an Oscar. Still, The National Enquirer (via Celebitchy) says Brad has joined the rest of the men on the planet who are all pissy their women are getting wet in the trenches over Jared.

But Brad is accusing her of “gunning for a second chance with Jared,” revealed an insider. “He assumed Jared was part of Angie’s checkered past. And when she went behind his back to reach out to him again, Brad was crushed. He blew up, but Angie claims her interest is totally innocent. Brad knows that Angie used to be in love with Jared. Brad and Angie have always grappled with trust issues and now their problems are threatening to boil over.”

Since my initial thoughts aren’t very gossipy, I’ll throw another theory out there:

Psst. Brad is secretly thrilled Jared is going to be hanging around because his luscious ombre locks remind Brad of Jennifer Aniston and he still carries a torch for her. BOOM! A classic Brad/Jen/Angie triangle-shaped snippet of bullshit straight out of 2006. Pass it on!

(Pic by World Economic Forum)

  • http://Website Blobfish

    This is easy

    Fuck: Angie
    Marry: Brad
    Kill: Not Hot Hobo Jesus

  • http://Website Marin

    Let’s play Fuck, Marry, Kill.

    Fuck: Hot Hobo Jesus
    Marry: Brad Pitt
    Kill: Fred Phelps

    I can’t bring myself to kill Angie. I just really want to bone Leto and marry Brad.

    • itsthepollvault@gmail.com

      I back your life choices 100%