Life got you down? Struggling at work? Going through a breakup? Kids sucking your will to live and making you wish he’d pulled out faster? Chin up, buttercup. There are uplifting messages everywhere in the world if you know where to look. A kind word from a friend. A mumbled, “I’d fuck her if I had to” from the transient gentleman who alternates between catcalling women and flipping them off outside the Walgreens in a dodgy neighborhood. And even Mariah Carey comes through with something profound on occasion when she isn’t being pushed around on dollies or helped downstairs, or pretending Jennifer Lopez doesn’t exist.
During an appearance with Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens Live!, Mariah was asked about her upcoming wedding to James Packer, the Australian billionaire with the busted face and beautiful bank account. She clutched her pearls over rumors the event will be circus-themed and then tossed out the same kind of uplifting material found on Twitter accounts with screen names like @justgirlthings.
Andy: “Will there be a prenup?. You’re both very valuable.”
Mariah: [quoting Kanye West’s “Gold Digger”] “We want prenup. We want prenup.”
“Look, everybody’s valuable.”
I’ll forgive her the Kanye lyrics and high five the sentiment that followed. Mariah knows a lot about finding the value in others.
Butler! Summon her trust fall lackey!